Diablo 3 Definitely Lacks Cows For Its Third Birthday

Diablo 3 Screenshot

Three years ago, always-online Diablo III was released into the wilds. In honor of the accomplishment, Blizzard has taken it back to the wilds with their anniversary post on the Diablo III Battlenet page.

That said, while the idea of some sort of “cowpocalypse” (as one terrified farmer has taken to calling this) is udderly ridiculous, it is worth noting that one can never be too careful. And so, after consulting with our local Horadrim chapter, we have elected to issue an advisory.

Effective immediately, we encourage all residents of Sanctuary to steer clear of the wilds. From dawn on May 15 to dusk on May 21, it is also recommended that you avoid entering any strange portals that may or may not lead to alternate planes of existence. This activity cud be potentially hazardous to your health and, in the opinion of this humble civil servant, is a veally bad idea in general.

Opinion: It’s hard not to appreciate the homage to the infamous cow level in Diablo II, it would seem part of the community was less than impressed. The amount of portals into the cow lands and lack of frequent responses has left the community rather soured to the milk of human kindness that is Blizzard doing a special event for the anniversary rather than just baking themselves a cake and taking the day off. Cheers for Blizzard’s sense of humor, even if the even was a less than stampede of gratitude.

Taylor Hidalgo

Editor
Taylor is a freelance writer, recreational reader, and enthusiastic conversationalist. He can be frequently found rambling on Twitter, writing on his blog, or playing too many shooters on Steam.

@NukeLassic

Freelancer writer. Features Editor at Haywire Magazine. Word Enthusiast, Game Enthusiast, and hopefully your next friend.
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